well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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