I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
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