So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
