to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
this just has baby written all over it
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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