So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Randomize
