whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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