I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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