its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
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