I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
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