fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
