Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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