her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
