thus making me awesome and them whores
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
