I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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