pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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