WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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