so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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