Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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