I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
