like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
