check it out our google latitudes are spooning
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Randomize
