Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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