I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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