I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
