I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
