From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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