omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
