You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
