from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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