OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize