I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
