Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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