talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize
