So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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