Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Randomize
