i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
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