you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Randomize
