My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
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