I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
