I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Dicks are not precious.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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