He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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