he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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