Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
