sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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