i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
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