Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Randomize
