so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
