This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
There are leaves in my underwear?
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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