that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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