Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
they need to just BURY HIM!
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
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